Could lending affect your friendship? 借钱会影响你的友谊吗？

陈小将

有些人认为，朋友之间谈钱伤感情。不论是借钱给朋友，还是向朋友借钱，都可能会影响两人的友谊。这里面到底有哪些风险？我们如何避免这些风险？本期 “随身英语” 围绕朋友间借钱的话题展开讨论。
词汇：borrowing money 借钱
Shakespeare once wrote: ‘Neither a borrower nor a lender be; For loan oft loses both itself and friend’. It’s often paraphrased and used as a warning about the dangers of lending, and how you could risk a friendship through it. But why can lending money be so detrimental to our friendships?
If our friend or family member comes to us for hard cash, it can be very difficult to turn them away. You feel under pressure to help. And if that money doesn’t come back, it can lead to fights or even legal battles. So how can we, as the lender, avoid these complications? According to Bradley T. Klontz, an expert in financial psychology, there are some steps you can take.
Understanding why there is an inevitable risk to lending anything to a friend is the first thing. And it’s not just the risk of losing the money, but the friendship could also be in danger. This is because, psychologically speaking, the action of lending has changed the balance of power. The lender becomes superior, while the borrower may feel awkward with the new arrangement. Likewise, if you try to advise them on what to do with the money, it might make things difficult between you two. In other words, let go – and see it as their money.
And if you can’t afford to lend something, don’t. Saying ‘no’ is hard when a friend comes asking, but if you need that money, denying them is probably the safest course of action. If you still feel the need to lend, making a legally binding agreement and putting things down in writing could guarantee instalments or deadlines. But, some friends may not take too kindly to being asked to make it official – seeing it as a lack of trust.
Finally, for some, it’s best to just see the money as a gift and be pleasantly surprised if something comes back. And if you do want to preserve your friendship, when you need to borrow some money, perhaps a bank is a better option.